That Floating Poo Was Far Too Meaningful! These Are the Television Disappointments of the Past Year.

As we reflect on the TV landscape of the recent year, a handful of shows emerge not for their brilliance, but for their notable shortcomings. Ranging from awkward spin-offs to bafflingly poor docuseries, here are the programmes that had us utterly bewildered or just reaching for the remote.

And Just Like That

How to start with this divisive follow-up? Burdened with woeful writing, painful character development (we demand better for Miranda!), and a paltry 71 seconds of beloved Samantha, the show fought to find its footing. Briefly, as the third series began, it seemed as if it had at last hit its stride. Then came an episode all about Seema’s natural deodorant. No wonder the creator announced this would be the final series. It ended on a bum note; the closeup of Miranda’s loo flooded with poo was just way too symbolic. Yet, fans certainly found joy dissecting every single “what on earth?” moment. And as Carrie – a single woman once more – danced around her palatial townhouse to Barry White, who didn’t let out a small sob?

All’s Fair

‘Is Kim Kardashian an actress? Of course she can’t.’

But that was practically the least of this drama's problems. The subject of a exceedingly uncommon no-star assessment, it was hard to know where to start enumerating the flaws. The hilariously wooden dialogue? The mind-numbing veneration of affluence and consumption? The seemingly deliberate procession of tropes? Acting so poor they felt borderline malicious? Let’s just say “each and every one” and forget about this show again. However, a second season has been ordered, so we’re probably going to have to.

AKA Charlie Sheen

Considering the legal troubles, abuse claims and parental shortcomings, it’s reasonable to say Charlie Sheen has been a troubled figure. Not you’d really have gleaned it from this three-part docuseries which smirked its way at Sheen’s various bouts of reckless hedonism while failing to tell us anything we weren't already aware of. Instead, it felt as if this loose cannon was being indulged, so any sympathy this show might induce should be saved for the people who have had to suffer close contact with this charismatic but flippant narcissist.

The Supercomputer Drama

Naturally we understood it was preposterous from the get-go: a thriller about a AI known as Charlie Big Potatoes that could either solve global crises – or destroy all of humanity. We stuck with it out of pure admiration for its stars … but by the end, it felt like even they had stopped bothering. One scarcely cared when his character died, and the other ended up hacking Charlie with an axe … in painfully slow-motion. Talk about admitting defeat.

MobLand

Dodgy characters convening in deserted boxing gyms? The Prodigy’s Firestarter blaring in club scenes? The late 90s called and demands its crime drama back.

Actually, that is harsh on the crime shows of the late 90s. Many look a bit old-fashioned now, but at least they didn’t endure the ignominy of having to indulge baffling dialects. But there were many other issues. Primarily that it was just profoundly dull; a conflict over narcotics territory between various cockney picaresques which felt rather simplistic.

With Love, Meghan

Considering the extent to which she provokes the ire of the nation’s performatively angry commentators, it’s temptingly tempting to admire the Duchess of Sussex’s various ventures into twee homemaking as intentional statements. But then you view them and are compelled to concede that actually, they might have a point. It’s like watching a lifestyle catalogue animated; a meme for wine o’clock with delusions of grandeur; a parade of sleeping dogs, humming beehives, sentimental sayings and pointless crafting “tips” you’ll not remember instantly. All underpinned by immense, mostly unearned wealth. Ugh.

Victoria Beckham

There are obviously fascinating things to be discussed about both Victoria Beckham and her struggles with career, identity, self-worth. But for some reason, this documentary series opted not to say them. Instead, the viewing was like consuming a marketing brochure. She clearly has every right to resent what she describes as her “stern” image. But sadly, she failed to do herself any helps with this guarded letdown of a series.

The Game Show

It should have been the next big hit – except even camper, with a famous star as a deceased benefactor and a well-known personality managing her inheritance. What more could you ask for? As contestants battled it out, there was plenty of betrayal and arguing. But the rules quickly became bewildering: it’s still too complicated to detail what exactly was happening. Even more disappointingly, we only saw glimpses of the star via filmed videos. The show ended up smelling of a programme that was straining desperately to live up to something far greater than it.

Too Much

How do you succeed a show that captured a generation? The pressure was enormous for this starry romantic comedy about Jessica, a rosy-eyed New Yorker who arrives in London with a shattered romance. The star seized the opportunity by the horns and was joyous to watch, reveling in Austen levels of romantic ideals. But it was all very slick and, ironically, was not enough. Plus, the sheer amount of famous friends involved felt uncomfortable.

The Sketch Show Return

Not even good enough to be ‘uneven’.

Given the smart recruitment of gifted younger comics, expectations were high. But sadly, most of it didn’t land. A recurring sketch was a one-note joke milked to a husk but recurring in every episode. One star seemed too ready to slip into a well-known ranting mode. The behind-the-scenes sketches, in contrast, simply provoked the thought that they should probably have remained in there a while longer.

The Knox Dramatisation

This retelling of the story of Amanda Knox was executive produced by Amanda Knox and pretty much solely showcased the perspective of Amanda Knox. So, while there undoubtedly is an interesting drama to be made about the horrific 2007 murder, this was not it. The material needed to be treated sensitively. Instead, the series struggled painfully to find the right voice, lurching from strangely breezy, somewhat stylised farce to inevitably, real-life horror. Complex? Arguably. A complete mess? Absolutely.

Prime Target

We love the star … but did we buy him playing the most brilliant maths genius since, a man so smart he’s on the verge of a breakthrough that could destabilise society? Nope! This international thriller about secret services targeting – and killing off – academics honestly got more farcical by the second. Formulaic nonsense.

1000 Men and Me: The Bonnie Blue Story

This uncritical portrait followed the online personality notorious for explicit escapades as she prepared for her biggest challenge yet. What on earth would possess her? What we craved was far greater examination of her actual psychology, plus those of the men in the line. They could at least have spoken to the now-famous mum who appeared to drag her son out of the queue. What we got was disturbing imagery and zero interrogation of her notoriety whatsoever. And to think, the documentary-maker has a young daughter too.